Tuesday 18 February 2014

Wall.Street.CRASH!!!


 I must admit these have been tense times. We are now in day 3 of mystery microwave meals and the trauma of having no kitchen. Our house has been turned into a winter wonderland, liberally bedecked with fine white brick dust.

 Power tools scream and grown men shriek as the walls are taken down into our new extension. This is make or break (the house) time. The back of the house is currently being propped up by what look like oversized railway screws and the upstairs study been turned into soup kitchen-meets-builder’s-mess-hall. Valentines dinner was served on reused takeaway tubs and the endless search for a microwave meal with that elusive quality- texture- continues in vain. Our relationship is being tested to the max, as is Alex’s life expectancy, after forgetting to close the lounge door yesterday before work commenced. We are thus playing a game of ‘guess the mystery piece of furniture’ under the brick snow.

 I am consoling myself, as I sit here in darkness and needing the obligatory wee with urgency only present when plumbing has been removed, with a search for our Rangemaster. Alex wants a big American fridge freezer and this is a sticking point. After pointing to the stainless steel lift doors at work yesterday in description of the fridge, and my long suffering colleague saying ‘ah yes, those horrible things!’, I am less than convinced. In partial recompense I am being allowed a range cooker.


I have to say I am finding it hard to see the silver lining at the moment. As I squint through the fog of drilling, I think for a moment that I have spotted the light at the end of the tunnel. Wrong again I fear. Alex has left the bloody door open again! 

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